Thanks for all of the comments... Paypal is usually pretty good about claims, but you have to file within a certain period of time after payment has been sent. Also, I unfortunately cannot call my credit card to dispute the charge, as the payment was sent out of the balance already in my paypal account.
All in all, I think the system we have is fine. Something like this is just the risk you take when you buy from someone you don't know very well. You need to always ask for references or feedback, either from other people he's done transactions with or Ebay feedback. Also, it helps if the person selling the part will send/post a picture of the actual part, and put a piece of paper in the picture with his name/forum name, and the date of the picture. It's pretty good evidence that he actually has the part he's selling.
I still have (some) faith that maybe one day this part will miraculously show up, but I'm not holding my breath. If the guy was in that much of a bind that he needed $60 to make it through the day, then he can consider it my gift. I'll write it off as a charitable donation...
