3000 Mile Roadtrip For A Creampuff!

[HealeyRick]

Has anyone noticed I've been MIA for the past week? Here's the story. Our semi-faithful 1996 Taurus with 140k developed a coolant leak behind the water pump a couple of weeks ago. Garage told me it would be $900 to repair on a car with a KBB of $300. With a host of other problems, it was obvious it was time to get some new wheels for my wife, who doesn't like driving the SRT-8 because she claims I'd go ballistic if she ever got it scratched in the parking lot at the grocery store. (OK, she's right, I would go ballistic).

Since we spent a wad of cash on the SRT, a new car was out of the question. I wanted something under $10,000 that wasn't a Camry with 80k on it, big enough to haul stuff and with a degree of comfort. What's out there? I started thinking about a 94-96 Impala SS. Same LT-1 motor and 460LE tranny that's still pulling strong in my '95 Z/28. Did a search on Autotrader and spotted some cars, but low mileage Imps run between $13-20k. Then one caught my eye. 30,000 mile car for $10,000. The catch?
it wasn't an SS, but a Caprice with the LT-1 drivetrain and heavy-duty suspension, minus all the SS stuff. That's ok, my wife treats cars like an appliance (she'd drive a refrigerator if someone would put four wheels on it), so low-key is fine.

Catch #2. It was in Bradenton, FL. No worries, I have a nephew in Tampa who sold Hondas who'd check it out for me. He did, and pronounced it a creampuff, as advertised. Two minor scratches on original paintwork, excellent interior and robust performance. Why only 30k miles? Seems a British couple who owned property in Bradenton bought it new from the local Chevy dealer and used it only when they vacationed in FL.

I had to be in Miami last week for work and took my wife along. I was hoping to be able to pick the car up before I left on Saturday and drive back. No way that was going to work out. I arrived in Boston at 4:00 pm on Saturday, woke up at 4:30 am on Sunday to catch a 6:15 am flight to Tampa on Sunday. Arrived in Tampa at 11:10 and called the seller. No answer! I was panicked. Rented a car (Dodge Caliber, actually kind of cool) to drive to Bradenton and finally the seller's wife answered after a couple more calls. Seems the seller had forgot to tell her that she'd have to open up the dealership on Sunday to deliver the car.

When I arrived at the dealer, the car was sitting outside. It was amazing. Looked like it had just driven off the lot in 1996. Took it for a test drive, only needed to go about 1/2 mile to realize it drove like a new car. For once, an internet car that lived up to its description. The dealer had been driving the car himself and loved it. He had installed Flowmaster cat-backs, window tint, and a shift kit, otherwise it was stock as a rock. We did the paperwork, handed over a check for $8,500 and at about 2:00 pm, I headed north back to Boston.

Car ran great. Around 4:30, I started looking for the Pats-Chargers game on the radio. Remember the days before Sirius? I'd listen to the game on one station for awhile, then as something interesting was happening, the station would fade out. Then I'd be punching the "seek" button looking for a new station that carried the game. I was just outside Brunswick, GA when the last quarter started. Time to stop! Found a Mexican place with a bar and got to see the last 2 minutes while I downed a margarita. Go Pats! I booked a hotel room, turned in at about 10:00 pm and was up by 2:30am ready to hit the road.

I had noticed the car ran very cool and when I started my drive, I found I had no heat. Not a big deal, I'd fix it when I got home. Set the cruise control at the speed limit and headed back home. A very uneventful trip. Drove by M&T Bank stadium, tough luck Ravens. Not to worry, the Pats will give Peyton payback for you!

Drove non-stop for the rest of the day (with the exception of gasoline stops, maybe a couple of pee breaks, java fillups and some fast food drive thrus) By the time I hit NYC, it was starting to get chilly. I stopped at a package store in CT to get some Jameson's I knew I'd need to warm up once I made it home. Ccrossed into Mass. around 9:30 pm and the rain turns to sleet. Welcome to the Northeast, Mr. Caprice. Then heading east on the Mass Pike, I had to pass a sander, throwing salt down. I really felt guilty exposing that car that had probably never been north of Tampa in its life to that insult. Oh yeah, remember no heat. No defroster either. The closer I got to Boston, the more the roads started to ice up, along with the windshield. I'd been driving for 19 hours and the last 30 miles of the trip was the worst. I was starting to get white line fever and I'm pretty sure I saw evil snowmen beckoning me into the guardrail.

Finally, made it home and thanked the Caprice. Sometimes we name our cars, other times we don't. Had a 86 white Sable we named "Moby" because it looked like the great white whale. The SRT is the Beast. On the drive, I thought about how odd it was for a British couple to buy this car. The Brits used to refer derisively as our big 50's American cars as "Yank Tanks". Now it's a term of affection for those from the mother country that like the old girls.

So I took a pull of the Jamesons, poured some on the hood of the Caprice, and proclaimed, "I hereby christen you Yank Tank!"

Whereupon, after 20 hours of fun-filled driving, 23 miles to the gallon, I proceeded to pass-out.

Yesterday morning, my wife gave approval to her new wheels, "Although the exhaust is kind of loud." (he, he).

I know this thread is worthless without pictures, so here's the Yank Tank in warmer days:




A little internet surfing shows these cars have a real following, from the Impala SS types to the owners who bought out of service police cruisers, known as the 9C1 option. Even saw a few posts by TommyZ's dad, who's a fan. There's a lot of mods I could do, but I'll keep it stealthy. Although, I'm going to put on four snow tires on these wheels:



And maybe a CAI, and some Billsteins, and .........

Oh, and the 3000 mi trip? 1500 down by plane, 1500 back by Yank Tank

[Ahbizmal]

Glad you made it back safe, and a great tale to tell...

I hate going white line blind. And those damned evil snowmen. lol

Welcome back to the forums in one piece and a nice ride to boot.

[mjr5150]

Wow........what a great read HealeyRick . Sounds like you got yourself a real nice....reliable ride for the wife.....and solid . Glad you made it home safe........and as always......nice to see you posting . Enjoy the Yank Tank........Good Luck w/ the pats , Mike .

[GoofyTimL]

Congrats on the CreamPuff Yank Tank, and a safe journey home. Thanks for sharing the trip.

[CplDaugherty]

Great trip... rare that you get what you think you are getting in a car over the internet, congrats... but the Pats are going down this weekend, sorry to be the one to break it to you.

[srt8danno]

Yes I’ve been wondering where the “banana boy” has been keeping himself….and to think he was in my back yard all along! I see quite a few “yank tanks” down here as people keep an extra car down here to use while on vacation. It’s pretty common. They’re usually in great shape as they’re never driven in the snow or ice and are usually garaged. Congrats on the great find. Glad you’re home safe and sound.
Cheers to your new land yacht!

[300 Addict]

Welcome Back! It's nice to see you made it back safely. Great Story! Nice to see that the car turned out to be in mint shape.. except fot the heater lol.

[4herb2tas0tik]

and i bet as you drove all them miles you thought "dam i wish i had my SRT8"
but great find for the wife thats for sure!

[Hemi57]

Great story HealeyRick

I like those Caprices. I had a local Holden Calais which was an almost identical design but a bit smaller.

Good to hear that you got a great deal. They are out there.

Better get onto that issue with the heat. Sounds to me like the thermostat is stuck open as you said it was running cool. You don't need that up there in the North East

[DUBSTER]

CONGRATS!!!!!! And WELCOME BACK!!