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Mods that is!!!

The worlds best Christmas mooch letter to your wife:

My Dear Sweet (WIFE NAME HERE),

You have been the angel of my dreams ever since we first met at (insert enduring early love memory here). I knew that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you. You have brought me so much joy and my life would be a blank moldy darkness without you in it. Your sweetness, your inner light, and the way you (insert endearing trait here or make up one) just make me melt inside. I thank God everyday that I met you. (if she is reading this note in front of you, try to time a decent attempt at looking pious)

This Christmas is just one of the many that I have been blessed with sharing with you. I know that this time of year can be stressful. You remember the time that Christmas of (insert year) that we (insert heartwarming funny story here)? I didn’t think that we were ever going to be able to live that one down! HAHAHA

Just so you don’t have to spend a lot of time and worry about me and, I just wanted to say that for this Christmas, all that I want is to bask in your undying love and a (HAMMER MOTORSPORTS AirHammer intake, not sayin’ nothin here. just for instance, you know.) It doesn’t cost as much as the (insert hideously expensive motor gizmo here) and I now that you would enjoy it as much as I do. But, I would be happy with just the (AirHammer). I already have your love and I don’t need that (insert hideously expensive motor gizmo here) that I had mentioned right off the bat anyhow. There is already enough for you to do and this should lighten your shopping substantially.

Heck they can ship it straight to wherever you want it to! We could talk this over with a bottle of wine at the hot tub, tonight! (make sure you have a hot tub). What do you say, baby?

One less hassle for my sweet ray of sunshine to cope with!!
I love you and I am always looking out for you, my real treasure, my lover,
(Insert your name here)

This bit of prose is sure fire to get some kind of result!! Heck… you might even get some leg!

See? I am a river unto my peoples!!!
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